“I Never Liked You” and Other Revelations from My Mother Before She Died

14 min readJun 23, 2019
Photo courtesy of Jobtalkdaily.com

“Just once before I die, I’d like to sit you in a chair so you could tell me why you were such a lousy daughter from the day you were born.”

With those words, my mother sealed her vaunted place in history as a truly narcissistic woman who lived her days casting aspersions on others’ character, but who never once looked in the mirror and asked herself what her part was in the unraveling of family relationships, her friendships and her life.

She kept her face in a Bible for most of her adult life. I don’t know what she hoped to gain from that exercise in futility because she never learned anything from it. This was the woman who would attend a prayer meeting service at her church and then drive home and call the preacher to correct him on the merits of his sermon.

I knew her as the mother with fists of fury, pounding the life out of me until I turned 27 when I finally fought back, hitting her so hard she landed on the floor. She looked up at me and said, “You hit me, you hit me!” This from a woman who spent her life slamming my head into the tile wall in the kitchen or straddling me on the floor as she beat me mercilessly and banged my head on the floor. She never laid another hand…